I am a musical person. I know I have rhthym because I can sing and play the piano. I can tap my foot or sway my hips to the beat of a song.

Then why does dancing usually feel so unnatural to me?

When I watch others dance,wether they are trained or are just dancing to a band in a bar, it all looks so natural to me. It's liek it is an unconscious process where they just hear the music and they are compleded to move. The music flows through their body and makes them dance. There is no thought, just movement and music.

Sometimes I dance I don't feel this. Every movement is calculated. Nothing seems to flow through me at all. It's as if I am trying to match an ideal that I don't quite have a grasp on. What should I do with my arms? Am I making a funny face? Am I doing it right. Sometimes I feel like a fraud that will eventually get caught, laughed of the dance floor. She's not doing it right. She's not really dancing.

After awhile though I decided to try and shed my dancing insecurities. Even though it still feels very mechanical times, I know that no one really cares. Maybe I have a misconception of what dancing really is. Maybe it isn't a natural process, at least not for some of us.

Then there are nights like last night. Things just seemed to fit. I danced and danced and I couldn't have danced more. I just closed my eyes and didn't think about what I was doing. I was in a crowded bar and I just danced. I didn't stop moving. I felt so good. Was I overcome by the music? No. Did I have fun? Yes, very much so. What was different? Was it the band? Was it the crowd? Was it the anotomity of being in a room of strangers? Probably not. All I know was that I needed it. I could tell as I shook my hips that it was exactly what I needed right there and then. Eyes closed, dancing.

Thank you Iain. That was a really good idea. I have been looking for that kind of fun for awhile now. It was exactly what I needed.