I feel so god-damn frustrated right now.
This is nonsense.
Everything is so unsure.
I'm actually stressed. I'm stressed because things aren't going to plan. Fuck. This is so screwed up.

I wish I had known.
I feel as if it is my fault, but I couldn't have known, could I?

Everynight for the last week (minus the night in the tent) I wake up at 4:30 in the morning and I worry. I worry so much. I grab my book so that I can try and stop the worry from keeping me awake.

Fuck I feel awful.